


Frankenstein Pizza

by Nievia



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Bad Cooking, Cleaning, Cooking, Cuddling & Snuggling, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, Explicit Language, Fluff, Frankenstein Mention, Kisses, M/M, Oneshot, Pizza, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, tumblr ask
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-14
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-15 12:10:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11805738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nievia/pseuds/Nievia
Summary: Jack and Gabe aren't the best chefs... but that doesn't stop them from trying to bake a pizza after watching a cooking show.





	Frankenstein Pizza

**Author's Note:**

> Oh man, this is based off of an ask I got on tumblr that I haven't answered in literal months. I'm such a jerk.
> 
> Anyways, I had a ton of fun writing this (once I finally got inspiration and didn't want to throw away every draft I wrote) and I hope you have a ton of fun reading it!
> 
> I really just needed some soft, domestic fluff in my life. Stuff is too stressful to write angst right now.
> 
> Enjoy!

It all started because of a video Gabriel found online. While on break from missions, Gabe often entertained himself by surfing the various video feeds online to get his mind off of things. That included anything from video-game walkthroughs to dog videos. Sometime through his recent binge, Jack joined him, cuddling up close on the couch and tucking his head under Gabriel’s chin to watch. They laughed at dumb pranks, scowled at rude comments, and even teared up at some shitty gum commercial until they stumbled across a cooking channel.

“Gabe, we don’t need to know how to make pizza, that’s what the cafeteria is for.”

“Screw the cafeteria. Imagine homemade pizza, fresh out of the oven when one of us comes home from a hard mission,”

Jack fell quiet, pursed his lips, and then, once realizing there was no valid way to talk himself out of such a good idea, grumbled for his husband to press play.

Neither Gabriel nor Jack were good cooks, but while watching a step-by-step video, they felt they could conquer anything the cooking world could throw at them. By the end of it, both were drooling, stomachs rumbling with desire, and the two men rushed to the store to buy the ingredients they needed.

“Did you bring the list?” Gabriel asked, rolling the grocery cart next to Jack and resisting the urge to ride on the back of it to return a few precious memories of childhood.

“What list?”

“The grocery list, honey,”

Jack looked up at him, blue eyes large and innocent, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Gabriel groaned and dropped his head to rest on the plastic of the grocery cart. “Neither of us wrote a list,” he stated.

“Don’t be such a baby, I can just look it up on my phone,”

Gabriel knew that, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t moan and groan about it the whole time just to irritate his husband, but Jack was used to it by then and simply shut him up with a quick peck on the lips. Gabe blushed, and lowered his head back to the grocery cart, this time from embarrassment rather than frustration.

“Found one,” Jack said.

They sped through the aisles, teasing each other and tossing things in the grocery cart for points. Sometimes Gabriel jerked the cart backwards just to watch whatever Jack threw fall to the ground and grin at the annoyance on Jack’s face. They were more careful, however, when it came to produce, placing a green pepper, an onion, and olives with all the gentleness of a parent caring for their child into the cart.

They irritated the clerk, Jack by giving him outdated coupons and Gabriel insuring that the coupons were not, in fact, outdated until the clerk called for the manager. Overall, not a bad shopping trip considering the shenanigans that occurred in the past (let’s just say sometimes super soldiers don’t know their own strength).

When they returned home and set the groceries out on the counter, they got to work. Gabriel turned on the video to rewatch so they could cook along with it and Jack began to cut up vegetables.

If they were honest, they would admit that they hadn’t really been paying attention to the video and that’s why their pizza came out so… monstrous. But the likelihood of that happening was slim to none, as both men were infamous for their stubborn personalities.

They used the recipe more as an outline than anything finite. “Oh, you know what would taste good?” Jack would say, and then promptly add something disgusting to the sauce.

“I don’t think we’re supposed to use the whole onion,” Gabe would grumble, but comply anyways because why the hell not? All pizza was good pizza, after all.

It wasn’t until they finished rolling the dough (uneven and still a bit lumpy) that they realized they may have made more than a few mistakes.

“Well,” Jack said, wiping some flour off of his face, “We might as well put it in the oven.”

They cooked it well enough, the crust not too soft nor too hard, but when it got out of the oven it didn’t look… right. Both men, covered in flour and spices and little bits of dough clumped on their clothing, stared at their creation in wonder.

“It looks like Frankenstein. Y’know, the monster from that old horror film?” Gabriel asked, not really expecting an answer.

Jack didn’t take his eyes away from the pizza. The cheese was sprinkled unevenly and there were too many onions and green peppers and not enough crumbles of bacon and certainly not enough pineapple. The crust on one side was noticeably thicker than on the other. “Do you think it’s edible?”

Gabriel shrugged, grabbed two plates from the cupboard next to the fridge, and loaded up both plates with slices of pizza. “We’ll just have to find out.”

The first bite was unexpectedly tasty, though both men decided that there were way too many onions to be healthy (or to taste good), and soon the two of them stood over the trashcan, picking off onions and taking large bites out of their Frankenstein pizza.

Soon enough, the whole pizza was gone and both men were left lounging on the couch with full stomachs and a wave of laziness rolling over them. “We need to clean the kitchen,” Gabriel sighed.

Jack only groaned in reply, letting his head fall back against Gabriel’s thigh and his eyes close. “Can’t we do it tomorrow? I’m beat from all that cooking,”

Gabe smiled, ran one of his hands through Jack’s blonde hair (which caused flour to dust his pants -- both of them could use a shower), and shook his head. “It’ll be worse if we leave it overnight.”

Jack groaned his assent and got to his feet, giving the kitchen the evil-eye from the doorway.

Gabe nudged him on his way in, “Many hands make light work, Jackie,”

“And really ugly pizza, apparently.”

**Author's Note:**

> Want to send a prompt? Want to support your local fanfic author? Go to my [tumblr](http://nievia-writes.tumblr.com) and hit me up! <3


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